Public humiliation

I’m still in a bit of a shock. It was so surprising. Unexpected, unanticipated, unimagined and several other un- something or another. It caught me completely unawares (there, yet another un-).

I hadn’t thought about it at all, because, well, why would I think about it? I would, of course, have no interest in it, none what-so-ever. If someone had asked me and made me contemplate it, I would have answered the same.

It wasn’t for me, I didn’t see how it could be.

Now I know different.

I don’t laugh when someone stumbles or spills something, whether it is on the street or in a TV-show. I don’t snigger if someone has toilet paper under their shoe or if their make-up has gone askew. If I have the opportunity, I try to make them aware of the problem, as polite as possible. I have too much sympathy to do anything else, besides, karma is a bitch.

If someone falls on the ice, or because of something else, it hurts to watch, even if it’s on TV. If there is a topic in a conversation that makes someone in it embarrassed, I try to change topic or take some of the focus over on me. I have no wish to see anyone embarrassed.

Because of all this I never even considered that I might like to see someone publicly humiliated.

Why would I ever want something like that?

Because it’s hilarious, that’s why!

And that’s the thing, the problem, the shock. I never saw it coming, not in any way. Okay, so it’s not really a problem, not at all. But it truly was a shock.

How could I not only stand to watch someone getting so very embarrassed, but laugh, really laugh at it. Not give a small smile or grin, not a low giggling, but a laugh that made it hard to breathe and made my face hurt? I don’t know. I honestly didn’t know I had it in me.

I don’t know if it was that one situation, that one evening, or if it will be like that if I witness something similar again. All I know is that it was so much fun and that I hope that I will get the same reaction on a similar occasion. I was in fits of laughter even on my way home. My face hurt for hours. Someone joked about hurting me by proxy. First they made the “victim” squirm and then they hurt me because I laughed so much from watching the “victim”.

Talk about having the cake and eating it too.


(For the record – and my own peace of mind – the “victim” in this situation was also laughing, a lot. The “victim” was, without a doubt, having a grand time too and it was, of course, consensual.)


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